An Honorary Presidential Candidate

Paris Hilton is as yet too young to actually become the President of the United States, but in keeping with her airhead persona, she has issued a "commercial" in which she assumes a candidacy from the fact that Senator McCain referred to her in one of his commercials. She proceeds to summarize a "hot" energy plan, showing unexpected skill in reading cue cards before resuming her tanning session by the pool.

The Hilton family is aggrieved by McCain's use of Paris's image as a symbol of vapid celebrity with which he seeks to equate Senator Obama. Their grievance is a little elusive to me, since they themselves trade on Paris's vapidity and the paradox of her being famous for being famous. They've done such a good job that I often wonder whether Paris isn't putting us on, affecting a pose in order to slum among more stupid celebrities whom she manipulates into making spectacles of themselves for her own amusement. That might be why she resents McCain even briefly making a political issue of her persona.

In any event, I would have shown you the "commercial," except that it's been pulled from YouTube due to the proprietary claim of the site where it first appeared. Out of spite, I will not link you to the footage, but you'll probably have seen it already by the time you've read this. I expect momentarily to see sales of "Paris for President" paraphernalia, with the woman herself no doubt aiming to profit from it all -- and why shouldn't she? It would only further my suspicions of her true nature to see her profiting off other people's stupidity, especially if people realize it's all a joke and then pay her anyway.