16 October 2008

Idiot of the Week Contender: Stephen Baldwin

Who could beat Sarah Palin in an idiot contest? How about a Baldwin brother. That brood has a built-in advantage, and Stephen steps up to the plate this week with an extraordinary piece of idiocy. It pales in comparison to the time brother Alec called on a mob to sack the home of Henry Hyde, but we don't judge idiocy by sheer bloodthirstiness. We judge it by the pure stupidity of challenging Senator Obama to a fight, calling him a "cultural terrorist," and being so scared of his ascent that he threatens to emigrate if Obama's elected. Meanwhile, Palin's stupidity of a few days ago may only show that she's hard of hearing. After all, she claims she's never heard anyone threatening Obama's life at her rallies. She could play up this hard-of-hearing angle to win some sympathy. The next time she hears people yelling at her and isn't sure what they're saying, she could say, "Louder!" Then maybe her audience will think she's heckling them. But until Palin's exact idiot status is resolved, I'm leaning toward Baldwin this week.

4 comments:

crhymethinc said...

And I believe the mass public should hold him to it. If Obama wins and Stephen Baldwin doesn't emmigrate, we should legally be allowed to "ride him out on a rail". After, perhaps a bit of the old tar & feather treatment.

Samuel Wilson said...

Back in the good old days, people used to place bets on elections. Not just monetary bets, but wagers that risked public embarrassment. One of the most popular gambits was for the loser of the bet to have to push the winner through downtown in a wheelbarrow. It sounds silly, but people lived up to their promises. What Baldwin ought to do is find an equally stupid Democrat -- Alec, perhaps, and propose such a bet. Come to think of it, the notion that some form of celebrity humiliation would be at stake might actually increase voter turnout in our decadent republic. Any suggestions?

crhymethinc said...

The loser has to engage in a "bear baiting" contest.
At the plaza in front of 30 Rockefellar Plaza, where the "Today Show" does their outside shots.

Since we don't want P.E.T.A. to have a hissyfit, the winner gets to dress up in the bear costume.

hobbyfan said...

Isn't Stephen the one who made a movie with Pauly Shore? That alone qualifies him for lifetime idiot status.

Seriously, though, I don't think he'll follow through on his threat to move to Canada. Like, I think they'd make him pass an IQ test to gain admission, eh?