24 January 2008
The Debate We All Want to See
The latest Republican get-together was a dry affair, with everyone on their best behavior. Instead of a dog-pile on McCain, as I expected, everyone, even Ron Paul, seemed to be more statesmanlike tonight. I give everyone but Paul another demerit for continuing to support the Iraq war, and Huckabee gets another on his own for his crack about "so-called assault weapons." But McCain gets extra credit for his late announcement that he was going to send Sylvester Stallone, his newest celebrity endorser, to "take care" of Chuck Norris in reprisal for Norris's disrespectful remarks about McCain's age. That encounter should be shown on all news networks simultaneously, with no holds barred, Gov. Schwarzenegger as the ref-- er, the moderator, and subtitles provided for people who don't understand Mumble. Let's make this happen, people!
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4 comments:
As if Chuck had a right to say anything about age. Isn't he an octogenarian? (Just kidding) Colour his hair all he wants, he's not that younger than McCain.
Maybe Chuck could kick his butt in front of a camera, (depending on who the coreographer is), but let's put Chuck in a real Vietnamese POW camp and let's see how he fares.
ROTFLMAO!!!! Maybe someone should send for Steven Seagal while they're at it?
If I recall right, Segal is now locked in a tight campaign with Richard Gere for high lama of Shangri-La or Sloppy Joe's or some such place. Actually, it's Xanadu -- I knew it all along. Anyway, Jed Leland tells me that Segal declared his candidacy for reincarnation of a lama in a key state that'll have a big voice in picking the next Dalai, but it wasn't until Gere threw his hat or whatever they use over there into the ring that everybody realized that the lama was still alive. So Segal said it only proved his superior awareness that the lama's soul was impatient to pass into its new host. To prove the point, he met with the old guy and -- well, you can figure out the rest. Now Steve is claiming to be the incumbent, but some of the old-school voters are griping that the new lama ought to be a baby, by rights, but the Segal team put an ad out that pushed the experience vs infancy issue. Before the campaign really heated up, Gere was buttering up the old lama and telling him he ought to reincarnate into a better looking body than Segal's, but he suffered in the polls when media watchdogs pointed out that, in his commercial, he used a picture of himself from American Gigolo instead of something more recent. Also, Gere has been known to show temper on the campaign trail when Segal operatives show up to heckle him wearing hamster costumes. We'll have more on this dramatic campaign as developments warrant.
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!! I wish this could be used in the newspapers. This is hysterical stuff!
Now, we know Mr. T is a born-again Christian, so maybe he'd be in Huckabee's camp. Stress maybe. Jesse Ventura's living in Mexico these days, from what I've been reading. For what, I don't know, other than writing another book. Now, whose side would Hulk Hogan be on?
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